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Fall Out with My Sister

by Brenda

I want to forgive, but -- I know it will never happen.

Some things can not be understood, so it makes forgiveness impossible. Four years ago my father's will cost me my sister. She could have made things right, but did not.

My brother and I have not spoken to her since. When I think of her I see her as a child. I can still love and trust that little girl.

In response to What Is Forgiveness?

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Fall Out with My Sister

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Breaks My Heart
by: Lora

Brenda,

It just breaks my heart to hear this sad story, especially when you say, "When I think of her I see her as a child. I can still love and trust that little girl."

Sometimes things can't be repaired. For some odd reason (the reason is probably because I'm odd) I think of that old joke, "How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?"

"One. But it has to want to change."

Yes, strange thought for me to have in response to your story, but I will explain what sparks it.

Your sister, in your case, is like the light bulb... sort of. Insomuch that you say you really "want to forgive her", but something prevents it.

The fact that your sister "won't make it right" is as if she doesn't see the need for forgiveness. She doesn't want to admit to wrong doing. She doesn't express the want to change... like the light bulb.

My hope for you, your brother, and your sister is that light would be shed on this situation and that you all see clearly. But, I understand that the light bulb must do the right thing and shine.

Lora




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Fall out with My Sister (unfortunate & sad)
by: Sharon Tompkins

Greta answer! I have a similar situation, & yes you are right. Someone that thinks they are not in the wrong, will not except forgiveness because, YES.... they feel they are not the one in the wrong, or did/said the wrong thing!

Both my Attorney & my Psychologist told me to "write off" the person, because otherwise, it will only bring about even more heartache...

Well, I tried hard to "reconcile" only for it to come back on me-ten fold!!!
"I" wasn't the one who did the "repeated" bad deeds.

It is true that you can't always make things right again! So sorry!

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forgive and forget
by: Anonymous

My husband and I were in a similar situation, Brenda. We decided family was way more important than estates, money or things (possessions) We are still friends with all the siblings.

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What's Important??
by: Anonymous

This same thing happens to so many families. Think we should ask ourselves... Do I want to let this situation ruin my relationship with my sister?

Will this really matter ten, twenty, thirty years from now?

Do your best to reconcile with her....family is IMPORTANT!! Think of all the time that has already been wasted by "Holding a Grudge"!!

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